On newly-weds and bad breath
A few days ago, I met SB on the train to work and we got around to talking about a couple, let’s call them K (the husband) and Y (the wife), from our JC days who’d just gotten married. After the usual “they’re gonna have ugly-ass children” comments which, in this case, will unfortunately be accurate, SB let me in on a theory of his.
“I have observed that newly-wed couples tend to have bad breath.” he announced.
“Huh?” I said, intelligently.
“It’s not just K and Y. It’s every newly-wed couple I’ve met this year. Their breath stinks.”
“I wonder why.”
“I mean, they can’t all possibly have decided to stop brushing their teeth after marriage, right?”
Which is when inspiration struck.
“Perhaps, it might have something to do with a number.” it was my turn to announce.
“Eh… what?”
“You know… THAT number. After all, what do newly-weds do the most?”
*nervous laughter*
“Don’t be disgusting.” he finally managed to mutter.
“That means that all the time you were talking to K,” I edged him towards the abyss “you were actually smelling Y’s…” and pushed.
“Fuck!”
“Exactly!”
“I have observed that newly-wed couples tend to have bad breath.” he announced.
“Huh?” I said, intelligently.
“It’s not just K and Y. It’s every newly-wed couple I’ve met this year. Their breath stinks.”
“I wonder why.”
“I mean, they can’t all possibly have decided to stop brushing their teeth after marriage, right?”
Which is when inspiration struck.
“Perhaps, it might have something to do with a number.” it was my turn to announce.
“Eh… what?”
“You know… THAT number. After all, what do newly-weds do the most?”
*nervous laughter*
“Don’t be disgusting.” he finally managed to mutter.
“That means that all the time you were talking to K,” I edged him towards the abyss “you were actually smelling Y’s…” and pushed.
“Fuck!”
“Exactly!”
5 Comments:
...........eww..
you have to understand, not only newlywed couples do it....
hmm...do all lesbians have bad breath?
As always, you open my eyes.
I wonder if anyone's ever mistakenly applied Vagisil to his/her toothbrush.
how about KY Lub? easier to brush your teeth with...less friction on the gums and coats your teeth, protecting them from tartar
Yes, but then everything will taste like glue (I'm just assuming here). Don't you judge me!
Post a Comment
<< Home