A Letter to the President(ial Candidate)

Dear Mr Presidential Candidate,

I read with great sadness of your failed application for presidency. It was a double blow for me as that also meant my noble aspirations to be the best secretary of state the world has ever seen have been dashed. It seems our plans to conquer Singapore have to be shelved for 6 more years. But rather than using the 6 years to hatch new plans and come up with an even better nostril smiting blow, what say we have a slight change in plans and attempt to oust the incumbent US president instead?

My sources tell me that his popularity is at an all time low because of his incompetency with the handling of the Hurricane Katrina aftermath. So what better time than now to rise up and smite his nostrils? The time is ripe, the ultimate prize is up there for the taking. Who cares about the Singaporean presidency? If we succeed, the entire free world shall be ours, Singapore included.

We have to act fast. Rumours are already swirling in the air of an impending coup and we have to strike before it reaches the president's ears. "To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun". I say NOW is our season, NOW is our time. Let us go forth and not look back!

I await your reply with great anticipation.

Kind regards,

Secretary of State-to-be